Apr. 20th, 2017

improperlyhuman: (dark Mulder)
I'm kind of bothered by the implications of how well I can relate to personal accounts of autistic traits. Reading https://kirstenlindsmith.wordpress.com/2014/12/24/spoons-and-splines-the-laws-of-thermodynamic-autistic-motion/, I could relate to being worn out by tasks that seem easy for others and being stymied by seeing tasks in terms of a large number of smaller tasks rather than a coherent whole.
It would explain why I get fatigued so easily.

Also, I finished watching the Female Autism Conundrum podcast today.

I'm almost embarrassed to say that I still sometimes think about trying to get another ASD evaluation. On one hand, trying something that failed so many times seems like a fool's errand. Yet here I am, inexplicably tired out by a simple trip out of town, overwhelmed by the number of steps required to keep my apartment clean, and anxious about being around people because my facial and bodily attitude may seem odd to them.

Moved up to squatting 100 lbs. again today and thought I wasn't gonna make it, but it got easier with each set. I did struggle on the very last rep and hurt my back a little, but I'll be ok.

I've been adding 5 lbs. to my squat and deadlift with each workout; I wonder how much longer I'll be able to do that.

I've been able to cycle every day (i.e. consistently) by decreasing the workout to 25 minutes. I had been trying to do 45 minutes, but that length of time got so boring, I would dread the workout and I ended up not doing it consistently.

I'm tired of eating.
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