Apr. 25th, 2017

improperlyhuman: (Default)
That body wash I got from VA dermatology made my skin worse. I have like two small wounds on my neck because of it. And I peeled the scabs off of them like an idiot. More than once. I don't give a shit anymore.

I can't do anything. I came home from the first therapy session nearly three hours ago, and I'm semi-paralyzed with upsetness. That would be ok, except I finally got some work, and I'm wasting time sitting here instead of working on it. But I don't want to make mistakes or waste my client's time by working hella slow.

My head hurts. I wish I didn't go to therapy. And I wish people would stop thinking I look depressed. It was ok. I mean it was worse than I'd imagined because I left there upset (I didn't expect that to happen quite so soon, but she said, "you look depressed" and I hate that shit), but she didn't seem shady. I'm glad the therapist is an older person. Young people are epically full of shit. I mean middle people. Small kids and elderly people are ok. Everyone else can die.

In the middle of last night, I had a nightmare about me and some other people being murdered or something, then woke up feeling traumatized. I went back to sleep and have since forgotten the details, though. Getting up a zillion times a night to pee has become a necessity because I wake up with a headache if I don't drink a ton. I have insomnia again, did I mention that? LOL.

I'm gonna try eating again.
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